Sunday, October 10, 2010

When you have a baby

I've had the most amazing weekend. We didn't go to Disneyland, or Hawaii, or buy some cool new tecky nerd gadget. Our family was separated for most of it, and I was at times lonely without my baby ducks. Heck I didn't even eat one delicious morsel of food. But this weekend was simply perfect in every way!

For ten months...yes 10...people lie and say nine, but let me tell you its 10! For 10 months you are united with one little soul. Often it's bad but mostly it's good and the little soul becomes your focus and objective. All thought surrounds the little one in your tummy. In essence your growing baby becomes what you are. I'm sure at the end of my pregnancy I was described as "that pregnant woman" many times by people. Whereas if I weren't the descriptions would be more like, "the brunette" or "the girl with glasses" or something like that, but when you're pregnant you are almost defined by that baby and belly. I also believe that as women we are often defined by our children and family status, but that's another post for another day...LOL!

So after having been so focused on this life which is in you, something strange happens when that life leaves your body and enters your arms. It's truly magical to experience the birth of you own child. Magical is the only word I can think of that is accurate. I swear every time I look at him I hear tinkling bells. I think the older I've gotten and more family focused...and more selfless, I've appreciated every birth more and more. This little guy is going to have it so good. Whereas Zander was a learning challenge for me, I've got all this pretty much figured out now, and Eryx will be the benefiter of it. A new baby is not seen as work at all, but a little toy for me. I can't wait to watch him grow!

Having said all of that, I just can't believe he's out and here and perfect. All of the worry and planning are over. He's here and healthy and in the blink of an eye he will be having his own children that I will get to sniff and snuggle.

I have met people or interacted with people who say that having kids aren’t for them, or that people should stop breeding. It just breaks my heart for two reasons...One, to put a bad spin on something that is so utterly amazing is so wrong that only the devil could be in control of those emotion based words, and Two, the thought that people will close themselves off of something that is so right and correct that you cannot deny it when it happens to you, is so so sad. I actually have a lot to say on this topic, but it's coming out strange so I'll leave it there.

So for us, for us we had the best weekend ever. We gave birth to our fourth child and I felt the Heavenly responsibility placed on our shoulders. I feel my Father in Heaven so much when I hold this new soul he just put under my guard. I am ever so grateful to have my children because they make me better. In some way I hope they will be able to say that about me one day too!

I will post some good pictures this evening...I promise!!!!
I can only do so much with hospital lighting!

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