Wednesday, May 5, 2010

My Independent Thinkers...the females

Sometimes my girls are hard. I complain that they have such strong personalities, but in all reality, they are great girls. They are grounded and are not caught up in the garbage of this world. Chris and I have tried really hard to keep them from all things really commercial. I've never been the type of mom who dresses them like dolls. I want them to have fun not worry about getting dirty. I want them to get dirty. I want them to learn about their world and not be afraid of sticky hands.

Did I care? No! Did I let her go out like this...of course!

Having said that (my new favorite phrase for so many reasons), I get so irritated by the little divas this world seems to be producing. Or maybe it's the parents producing it...either way...chicken or the egg.

In my experience, little divas grow up to be big divas. Big divas have a hard life. Nothing is ever good enough for them, their bodies, their homes, their husbands.

So why are we teaching our girls to never be satisfied, to be obsessed with their looks, and not be good friends...hmmm. Is it so mom can feel satisfied that her daughter is dressed better than her friends so that makes mom feel like she's a better mom...I don't know really. I don't buy into that. My proof is in the pudding. Its how she behaves for others, how she shares, how she learns, how she respects adults. To me this is way more important than a big bow in her hair.

I don't know about you, but I'm too busy teaching my girls important things, more than how to match your bow, skirt, socks, purse and whatever else they feel they need to adorn themselves with. I don't have time to waste on nonsense. Maybe it's just me.

A handful of months ago Mia and I got our feelings hurt by a little diva and mother of the diva. Someone who was supposed to be a dear friend of mine. I've thought so much about this diva syndrome since then. I was almost made to feel put down because my Mia wasn’t a little diva like the rest. After all, diva is the new cool in six year olds right?
Well I've decided that like myself, I'd rather Mia be an individual. She is different from her peers and I love that about her. She does not go along with the pack. She does not do things to impress others. She is kind when others are picking on each other. She is not obsessed with clothes and hair and STUFF. She is so smart and quick. I've spent so many months watching my Mia grow up and change into a wonderful little girl. I'm grateful that this little issue happened a handful of months ago. It's taught me so many lessons about friendship and the type of person I want Mia to be...the type of mother that I am. I am grateful that I have a diva free home. I'm grateful for independent thinkers and I will always encourage that no matter the little divas in our life that are lost, because as I've really wasn’t a loss at all.

1 comment:

nuttbutts said...

i was kind of worried about anna. i have always been such a tomboy. i dont have piles of nice clothes i dont ware a lot of makeup etc etc. somone asked me once what i would do if she wanted to be a girly girl. well i dont care what anna decideds to dress like as long as she is a good person. she loves to dress up and ware make up and polish and such. but she also loves to go out and play with the boys and is not afraid to get dirty. lately i have made a little more effort in the looks department so i can show her you can be all things if you want to be. she still throws tantrums sometimes but she is a good girl and i love that she has her own personality independent of me and others. i for one think it is awsome that you let your girls decide for themselves and teach them its ok to be who they want to be.